Happy Halloween

It honour of the Halloween weekend this blog is about a horror movie I just watch called SAW4. Now let me preface this by saying that in no means am I a horror fan. In fact just the opposite. It the one genre of film I have avoided because I don't like all the blood, gore and crap. So how do I make it through SAW well with one eye closed, hiding behind the sofa, the volume muted for the screaming parts and if it's recorded, fast forward through the grisly parts. But even with all of that I generally enjoy the SAW movies. It's the lesson behind the test the villain sets. Though even as I say the word villain I don't think that adequately describes Jigsaw. I am more inclined to call him an anti-hero.

For those of you who follow the SAW movies you may agree that Jigsaw has never killed anyone. He has always set up scenarios where the "victims" are given choices and it is these choices that determine if they live or die. I think our anti-hero is like a crucible master. He turns up the heat until what emerges is a purer version of oneself. He understands the human psyche and he gives the protagonist so many chances to make the decision that would shake them out of their reverie and into a new birth from the death of their old selves. But few, if any I have seen have been able to make that transition. Jigsaw is a counsellor with unorthodox methods. He's no Freud. But he does pushes you to the edge and require you to face your ego/self in the mirror.

To some degree I think we all have a "Jigsaw" in our own lives. Everyday we are put through tests that we have to face and hopefully come out the other side a better person than when we started. However like the people in this movie more of us fail these tests than pass. Luckily when we fail we don't get out rib cage pulled out of us or torn limb from limb (though it would make life more interesting). Admittedly most of us know we have a problem, everyday we arrive home and the first thing we do is plop ourselves down in front of the computer or television set even though you know you have that coursework to finish. Test 1: You promise yourself this time when I get home I wont watch any television or Internet I will study for that exam. You get home you, get the books out. 5 mins later you get hungry. You decide to cook dinner. Then you notice the house is a mess and you kill a few hours cleaning it from chimney to doormat. Result: We realised what we did. We procrastinated. AGAIN.
You decide to quit smoking. Today is the first day and it's going well so far. Test 2: Everything that could go wrong goes wrong. The boss is yelling at you. You are running late for every meeting today and nothing is going right. Today was not the best day to quit smoking. Maybe tomorrow will be better, you think,  as you suck the life out of white stick and watch the smoke curl into the air. Results: Failed.

The point is everyday we have these little test, temptations, whatever you wish to call it that tempt us away from what we are trying to become. Most of us, myself included, if we fail we are tempted to give up. Why bother, it's too hard, is my life going to really change, I'm happy. Our minds a chamber of excuses that will get us killed. Unfortunately in life the only constant is change. Whether we fight or accept this change will determine what path our lives will take. Will we end up broken, scared but alive or would we be the living dead?

Happy Halloween everyone!!