Happy Parents Day

I never trusted the water companies, they must have spiked my tap water. It's the only explanation for what's happening to me.

Lately I've been feeling broody, paternal, maternal even, which is interesting since last time I checked I was still a guy. But the way I'm feeling I'm only surprised I'm not lactating. All my friends are starting to have, or have started having families. Babies, toddlers and ankle biters are all around me and where previously there has been no interest on my part for anything beneath three feet tall, suddenly I find myself starting into strangers prams and smiling at their little bundle of joy. What is up with that?

First off let me say I''ve always valued my independence, having no commitments or family ties to stop me from achieving anything I want to in life. The things mere mortals prized highly a love one, kids, family, a home, a mortgage...living the dream they called it. I thought you might as well lock me in a damp dungeon and throw away the keys. It was a nightmare scenario for me cause I felt it meant that I was becoming trapped and my life was over. Now all of a sudden I find myself fantasying about having a relationship and a family or as I sometimes call it, a jail sentence with hard labour (with the possibility for parole for good behaviour, of course).

I must admit, this familial interest isn't a recent development. It's been on and off for the last 4-5 months now but I've only just gotten the courage to publicly admit it. I think it came full blown when I visited my cousins with their children. I should have know it was a conspiracy when I was getting all these hugs from the 3 and 7 year old and  the cutest smiles from the 1 year old. They worked me over for the three weeks i was there, melting the ice around my heart until they had me wrapped around their little fingers that I was promising of entertaining them in London should they visit. Oh, they got me good. 

I thought being back in London the ice around my heart would start to reform and harden but no. Instead I'm having dreams of my future children (Marcus and Celia) yes, that was their names in the dream, and it's seeping into my reality so now I'm thinking of getting a little rugrat of my own. A mini me with whom I can plot to take over the world. But children are for life, not just Christmas. That means they are a HUGH responsibility. Even with the German nanny. The friends of mine with toddlers tell me the stories of sleepless nights, concerns about teething, illnesses. And it doesn't get any easier as they get older. I see the neighbourhood kids and I think I don't want my son/daughter hanging around "those" kids. Cause you know when they reach teenage years, if they were anything like me there'll be doors slamming, moody spells of silence cause if you don't know what's wrong I'm not going to tell you, and finally spending alot of time in the room alone listening to heavy metal music or "researching" (the male readers know what I'm talking about). I don't know how my mother put up with me.

I should go give her a call. So to all you mums and dads out there I salute you. You're doing the toughest job with no pay, but you can't beat those hugs, kisses and laughter for perks.